Seasons Change

Ryan took us on a detour tonight. We Packed the car up (why does that take so long after only being at the lake for 2 nights?), threw Jammies on the kids, graham crackers in each lil' hand...and therein began our familiar 50 min trek home. 

But, we took a detour. He wanted to see the "homes out in the country...cause...ya never know Lib!" 😉 There IS something kinda magical about the countryside. I think I would get lonely if we lived out there, but what do I know? Anyways, while exploring tonight, we came across this field. Right next to a corn field but it wasn't corn that was growing. Not sure exactly WHAT it is. Ellie yelled from the backseat, "mom! That field is raspberry looking! Whyyyyy?" 

 

This picture barely captures it--but it was lovely as all get out. Green around the edges, tan hay of some sort underneath, and then that "raspberry" or reddish colored stuff on top. 

(Ha! Anyone who is remotely educated in farming is legitimately chuckling at me right now). 

But here's the deal...I felt like it was a field of in-between. 

In between two corn fields. 

In between green and beige--hence, raspberry...

In between summer and fall. 

In between seasons. 

That's our life right now. We are in between. And it's uncomfortable at times. 

One week left of summer and school begins. A new schedule and routine awaits. In between seasons. 

Ryan and I are both training for races right now. We have to keep plugging away at the running yet fear race day! In between seasons. 

Ellie is battling being a little kid but growing up and experiencing maturing emotions (I think that's the nice way of saying it)--and she is in between. 

We wait for the day when our call comes from the agency telling us who our son will be. No control. Nothing we can do to speed it up or hand select this soon-to-be Snow. We are IN BETWEEN. In between our familiar and even rather predictable life right now and...well, not exactly sure. But a lot of change ahead. 

God has been working on me this summer. I think He's been digging deep in me as a mom, a friend, a wife, a family member...I'm having to surrender control and trust God bigger. I guess that's what He asks of us in in-between times. 

Ironically my little Griff's memory verse from church last month was this...

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. (Proverbs 3:5, 6 NLT)" 

So we learn together. :)

Get Outa Town!!!!

That's what I said when I opened my email today. 

And then I screamed. 

:)

T'was a good day and a good report for our monthly update. 

Our hearts are racing a bit tonight, and we have a bit more of a kick in our steps---as we moved 16 whole spots in July!!!!

Yesssss! Praise God for this news. And, moving those 16 spots actually puts us right at #16 on the list now. 

Only 15 people ahead of us. 15 more people who are waiting for their face, name, and picture, to show up in their inbox. Maybe only 10 or 12 are requesting 0-2 boys like us...? 

WE. ARE. SO. CLOSE

My mind kind of skips to the what-if's at this point...now anticipating a quicker timeline than we were even just 2 months ago. 

So, unless for some reason referrals stop happening altogether the next two months, we could very well be "meeting" (via email) our little dude oh so soon. :)

Once our agency matches us with a child, very soon after we receive our court date and book flights to travel to Ethiopia for trip #1.

Lots of joy and smiles at the Snow household tonight. We celebrated with a game of PIG under the basketball hoop, and some leftover ice cream pie. It was a little bit easier tonight, for us to imagine our little man joining the fun (or complete chaos) before too long. 

But...

Psalm 16 is appropriate tonight. For a lot of reasons. Not only is 16 the magic number today, but this was the Psalm I read in its entirety to Linda, my mother-in-law, the last time I ever saw her. It was a moment I will never forget and treasure that we shared together before she went to be with Jesus. She would be rejoicing with us tonight as well. This I am certain. 

"Lord, you alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing. You guard all that is mine. The land you have given me is a pleasant land. What a wonderful inheritance! I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.  No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice. My body rests in safety." (Psalms 16:5-9 NLT)

...the rooster crows

The break of dawn...

And the rooster crows. 

Literally. As I sit here and watch the sunrise, there is a rooster crowing over my right shoulder, on the farm down the road. He is claiming his territory, welcoming the day for his fellow chicken friends...and for me. 

It's kind of a "romantic thing" that roosters intrinsically know to crow at the break of dawn. It's his voice and his job. It's a territorial thing for the mature chicken on the farm too: 

 "The highest ranked rooster has priority in breaking the dawn, and lower [ranking] roosters are patient enough to wait and follow the highest ranked rooster each morning," said Yoshimura

But the neatest thing to me, as I sit here and listen to my buddy down the road, is that he does it EVERY morning. It's a new dawn and a new day and he chimes it in proudly and loudly and quite clearly. He is faithful in his job. 

I was talking to my friend Jess yesterday about our family and how refreshing it was for us to jump up on the list a little bit. Our last update was a breath of fresh air for us. I told her I feel like we're entering a new season now as we're getting closer, "Breaking the dawn," if you will. We talked about a dear friend of mine and her recent experiences in Uganda when she went to meet her children. Their family of 5 surely is entering a new season, about to jump to a family of 7. 

But like my rooster friend, chiming in this new day for me, I need to crow again TOMORROW, or at our next update on Aug 1, even if its disappointing. OR when we finally meet our son and can't bring him home yet...or when we do bring him home and feel a little scared about what's ahead. Keep on crowing. 

 read this just now:

"God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. So we will not fear when earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea. Let the oceans roar and foam. Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!  A river brings joy to the city of our God, the sacred home of the Most High. God dwells in that city; it cannot be destroyed. From the very break of day, God will protect it." (Psalms 46:1-5 NLT)

So thankful we have a reason to crow at every new season. So thankful "God is dwelling in this city" among us. 

Who knows what our family will look like a year from now. Man that is so hard to imagine. But our God protects us at the very break of every.day. 

Happy Birthday!!

Today I turned 34.
I feel blessed today.
I was surprised by a dear friend and my great hubby with an overnight getaway last night, followed up with a tour of GREAT food this morning.
Another dear friend took such good care of my kiddos while we were gone, and I came home today to hugs and smooches from the munchkins. 
I got some beautiful flowers for my kitchen counter.And I really love flowers.

And best of all...not only is today my birthday but it's the FIRST day of the month. You know what that means. That means we check our inbox 2x an hour until "WAIT LIST" pops up in the subject line.
And today it did.
And oh did it...

We moved 8 spots this month...6 of the referrals that were given in June were 0-2 year olds, which is what we want to see moving steadily.
We are currently #32 on the list! Praise God!

Happiest of birthdays.
Yes we wait... but yes we see God continue to prepare us and nudge us and get us closer to meeting our boy.
So excited. So thankful. 

What's the forecast?

I am always looking at the forecast. I got that from my mom. She loves to tell me what it's going to be like out there "this weekend." And she has officially caused me to be addicted. I even have the local weather app. And when I know I'm hosting company or having a party...game over...you can bet I will be checking that app at least 12 times the day before.

It's hard to predict the weather though, I would imagine. I'm not a meteorologist, and frankly don't even know one personally, BUT I can imagine that they have days where they bite their lips and say "whoops." It happens. Sometimes the forecast is wrong.

Ryan and I did some premarital counseling for a young couple (and great friends) last night. We talked about how one of us always seems to be realistic or pessimistic (that would be Ryan) about life situations, and one of us seems to be idealistic or optimistic (that would be me) about life and things we are going through. Neither is better than the other. They are both faulty. Kinda like the meteorologist...he/she is just faulty at times. Especially when it comes to predicting the future.

So. We get asked ALL THE TIME about our number on "the infamous list." We get asked monthly, or maybe more, why it costs so much to adopt a child when our country and other countries should make it affordable and easy, due to the number of orphans in this world. AND...we get asked bi-weekly why it takes so long to adopt a child when there are millions of orphans out there needing homes.Great questions.

 If you ask Ryan (remember...the realist or pessimist at times), we are just crusin along and being patient as we wait for our turn to get the phone call that tells us our son is ready. "This process is taking just as long as we thought it would. Don't get excited yet....we have a long way to go."

But if you ask me...(the idealist and optimist...and crazy planner...and painfully impatient one of the bunch) then I will tell you that:
 we are slowly but surely moving up the list.
currently at #40. 
although we are #40 that does NOT mean that the 39 people ahead of us want a 0-2 boy
so maybe we're more like #20???
we have picked out a name (not gonna tell ya yet) and we hope to know who he is by Christmas.

The truth is this...as humans, we can't predict the weather next week. And we surely can't predict or plan for the timing of our little dude's homecoming. Just can't happen.
My friend Beth reminded me the other day that the age, personality, character, sleep habits, eating habits, and TIMING of this child will be perfect for us.
Out of our hands.
Trusting something bigger.
Not gonna keep "looking at the weather." Taking a deep breath today.
:)

 

A few more...

A few more spots indeed!
We went from #45 on April 1 to #42 on May 1. These aren't the kind of jumps we're praying for, as we were moving 6-10 spots each month when we first jumped on board...BUT, we are moving. Praise God for that; we are moving!
I say that every month, but it's true...there is growth. And we stand steadfast as life moves on.
Ryan and I were taking a walk yesterday and talked about what "our ideal" would be as we look forward to the next 12 months in this journey. (We also have people ask us this question all the time).
This is what we're hopeful for, what we'll pray for, and what we'd love to have you pray along with us:

That we would average 5 or more spots per month for the next season.
That we would travel to meet our son for the first time around Christmas/the New Year.
That we would bring home our little guy by this time next year, which would put us in the 2.5 year time frame of start---finish.

We are VERY well aware of the emotional implications of having ANY mental timeline in the adoption process. It's not always wise and it's almost never realistic. We have friends who have graciously fallen within the average 2--2.5 year process of a typical adoption. We also have friends who have brought home their child much sooner...and much later. 

The bottom line is that we have not grown weary and we have not grown impatient. We have great joy in our hearts as we imagine how our family will change.
And...our family is already changing. We are THRILLED that we will have a niece "home" from China in the next 6 months, Jenna Jean Preston will be joining the Snow/Preston family very soon. We could not be more excited to meet this girl and watch as Ryan's sister/brother-in-law take the first steps in becoming a new mom and dad once again.

You see, there is much to be celebrated and we have reasons for great joy!! 

Rosie

We call Emma, "Rosie," but that's not her name. It's not even her middle name. But everything about her is "Rosie," as she came out of my womb with the largest rosy cheeks a mom could ever desire so as to smooch and cuddle.
As she has grown up to be 5, her nickname still stands. She is strikingly beautiful and hard to open up at times. She is rather mysterious and OH so sensitive. She is my lil rose.

Putting Emma to bed the other night I was totally enamored by her innocence and had the most intense moment of loving this kid. I was scratching her back, knowing my days with her like this are fleeting. The age old parallel of Gods love for us, as compared to our love for our kids, hit me like a ton of bricks. I sat next to her all teary eyed as I tried to even remotely understand that incredibly real comparison of how much God loves his children. All of them.
It's something spoken too often and rarely understood. But I think I tasted a glimpse of that this week.

I know God loves me drastically more than my love for my 3 kids. I tried to picture this brown little face out there, that will someday be close to mine. It's hard not knowing him yet. But I was thankful in that moment that God used my lil Rose to help me smell-- or taste--or see, that HE loves that little brown face, Ellie, Emma, and Griffin, even more than I do. I guess being a parent is constantly learning that we aren't in control, eh? It's constantly learning we have to trust the God who made them, WITH them.